On Customer Service HELL

I like to think of myself as being level-headed most of the time. Sure, as a teenager I was a bit of a hot-head and prone to impulsiveness but time has aged me like a fine wine, dulled my temper, and given me great willpower (he says after polishing off a pint of ice cream he said he’d only have a bite of). There aren’t too many situations that cause me to lose my temper these days, even being cut off on the freeway by a selfish and idiotic driver will only elicit the odd “Come on, man,” from me. There is one situation that will truly cause my temper to flare: dealing with an unhelpful customer service phone call.

Dealing with customer service isn’t always such an enormous pain that one has to resort to writing an entire article about it. Sometimes it can be easy, it can be productive, and it can even leave you feeling all warm and fuzzy. If you come in with the right attitude, you can solve your problem in a matter of minutes.

There are times, however, when you could have the best attitude, the patience of a saint, and the empathy of one of those dogs you see in YouTube videos who help people who are in emotional distress… and you can still be left seething with anger. Today was one of those days for me. My significant other and I are finally moving (which is GREAT) and that means setting up utilities and internet at our new apartment (which SUCKS). My partner being a young professional who works from home much of the time and me being…well a guy who writes sometimes and uses the internet like a junkie, getting reliable internet set up promptly was a major concern. I got through most of the setup pretty okay until…I ran into some technical problems and had to contact customer service. That’s when my day went to hell.

The first person I dealt with was totally cool! She was very understanding and kind and I was very patient with all the waiting I was asked to do. Then, she had to transfer me to another department and I met my worst enemy. I don’t know what this person’s deal was but they refused to help me with my problem and instead spent twenty minutes trying to shill cellphone plans on me. No matter how many times I said, “no thank you,” or “I’m good with my service,” I was met with, “why? Don’t you want to save money?” OF COURSE, I DO BUT RIGHT NOW I JUST WANT INTERNET!

Eventually, this person put me on hold for HALF an HOUR and I think it was mostly because they were mad I wouldn’t buy a cell phone plan. By now, I was grinding my teeth and balling my fists. I was pushed to my limit and finally had to ask to speak to a manager because I just wanted my account straightened out! That’s when she started asking, “why? I can answer your questions.” IF YOU COULD ANSWER MY QUESTIONS, WHY AM I STILL ON THIS CALL AN HOUR LATER!? At a certain point in all this arguing, they told me I was being “very unhelpful” and then… they just hung up on me. I’m still in shock with the entire proceeding and I honestly don’t know if I’ll ever be not mad again. I mean the absolute GALL to call ME unhelpful! I can feel my blood pressure rising just thinking about the call again!

What about you? What’s your worst customer service experience?