On Letting the Hate Flow Through You

Hate, in most circumstances, is a bad thing. My parents tried to teach me never to say I “hated” something as a child (obviously that didn’t stick). Hatred can lead to some truly awful things: ruined relationships, violence, war, total global annihilation. But that’s not the kind of hate I want to talk about. No, I want to talk about the fun kind of hate, the good kind of hate, the kind of hate I want to flow through you.

As I sit here, writing this essay, the NBA season will end in a matter of days, Hockey is over, and baseball approaches the dog days of summer. These are the types of the arenas in which hate can be truly wonderful. Growing up in Los Angeles, as a die-hard Dodger fan, I learned something that Dodger fans have been learning since they were dodging trolleys around Brooklyn and going to games at Ebbets Field-- (and buying hotdogs for ten cents. Now they cost literally 70 times more…and don’t even get me started on $16 beers!) --to hate the Giants with an absolute burning passion. 

This was, of course, extremely easy. The Giants during my lifetime have employed players like the quintessential steroid abuser and record destroyer, Barry Bonds, and the eminently unlikable Madison Bumgarner…they also won championships in 2010, 2012, and 2014…ugh. But the fact that they had arguably the greatest hitter of all time and the most unbelievably clutch playoff pitcher, coupled with their success is what made them fun to hate! Nobody should hate bad teams, it’s no fun. And when your team is struggling to achieve mediocrity, hating your rivals is sometimes the only thing that can make a season palatable. Since only one team can hoist that championship banner, and all the others are losers, cheering for your rivals to fail and join you in the pits of loser-dom can be almost as much fun as winning.

And this doesn’t just extend to sports. I, personally, hate Drake. I know I’m in the minority here but that’s what’s appealing about it. I just can’t fathom the dude as a cool rapper or a seductive crooner. I mean the guy’s first claim to fame was a supporting role on the Canadian teen drama Degrassi! Where he was shot! And now he wants me to take him seriously as a rapper, who brags about how good he is at sleeping on planes?? Never mind that he’s one of the most prolific, most successful, most well-liked musicians of my lifetime. I hate him! But in a fun way. 

And fun hate can bring people together in surprising ways. You’d never believe how many people I’ve bonded with because I hate cilantro with the burning fire of a thousand suns (it absolutely tastes like soap to me). I’m also instantly friends with any other person who hates pickles as much as I do (look cucumbers taste bad and I don’t care how you dress them up, they’re still shitty veggies). 

So, while I still think real hatred is bad, like truly truly bad, I think there’s room in our world for a little more fun hatred. The kind of hatred you can rib people on the other side of the debate, but still go have a beer or a Dodger dog with after. 

What about you? What do you hate in a fun way?