29 Comments

I absolutely agree with this grossness. Also appreciate the use of Sisyphus (which I had to Google). Good one!

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Thank you! Just trying to spread all my weird thoughts and useless knowledge to all!

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Ok, Will, I agree. And this will be the first (and only) time I will put forward an ad in your wonderful posts. Here is a product that will divest you of your wet trash trauma. It WILL, however, require you to ask Santa (i.e. your parents) for a Christmas or Hanukkah gift for the holidays. Just think: you can rid yourself forever of the wet trash trauma and at the same time, do some serious eco-friendly work. AND, if you have a garden .... wow. Please forgive this blatant Ad. It is GENIUS! https://www.crateandbarrel.com/vitamix-foodcycler-compost-machine/s683919?localedetail=US&a=1552&campaignid=12495285595&adgroupid=120645470124&targetid=pla-1912108808328&pla_sku=683919&pcat=HSW&ag=adult&scid=scplp683919&sc_intid=683919&gclid=Cj0KCQiA7bucBhCeARIsAIOwr--8UEqZxsZGayGbN2KLdoUwwSYbdiYots-MhAs_LAbtgjZtYd1Z2LMaAjFnEALw_wcB

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How much are they paying you for that wonderful advertisement? How do I get in on this gig!?

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Ha! Alas I paid full price. You’d be a perfect rep! You put in garbage and it comes out like cornflakes!

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Potential life hack: If you have the freezer space, toss food waste into a shitty, plastic takeout container and freeze it until you’re ready to take out the trash. No more odors or wetness

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woah! Now that is a life hack!

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Dude—you are gonna love changing diapers and cleaning kid vomit off your shirt and neck….

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Yet another glowing review of parenthood!

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Exactly the comment I was going to make. And the most surprising thing is, while I wouldn't say I loved changing the author's diapers and cleaning up his kid vomit, I can honestly say, I didn't hate it. Because that same kid always looked so damn cute when he was sleeping that I found myself projecting a tiny bit of that cuteness onto the stuff he...projected out of both ends.

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Hey man, I didn't ask to be born. That was your fault.

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hilarious

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Wait until you have kids. They get garbage wet in entirely new ways.

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Hahah why are people always trying to convince my generation not to have kids!?

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No!!! You have to have kids!!! We just have to warn you. :)

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Glad ForceFlex kitchen trash bags👌🥳

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True, higher quality trash bags can save you some of the time...but other times, the wet trash is too powerful for even the fanciest of trash bags!

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Bed bugs are 100,000,000.00 GS

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couldn't agree more! Gross little hoes

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Because you hit the nail on the head and completely grossed me out (and since I have been appointed the trash guy in our house) , I looked up food composters on Amazon, thinking that might help the situation. Well, they're all expensive that I can see ($500 range) and from I can tell they just metamorphasizes the trash and you still have to figure out what to do with the results. I see Lee finds the machine helpful, so maybe I'm wrong. Still, asking it for Christmas/Hanukkah just seems wrong. Like that Christmas when instead of toys you get clothes.

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That’s the thing about growing up though, I’m stoked whenever I get stuff like socks for Christmas because that means I don’t have to buy it myself!

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We have a trash bin dedicated to compostable material only. Testimony to its grossness is that our neighborhood raccoons won't go near it.

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Sheesh, that means it really must be the grossest of the gross!

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Like a scene from a '50's horror movie.

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Oh, I thought your were writing about poor, white, incestuous swamp dwellers. My bad.

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Ha!

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Enough of this trash talking. It's time to roll the bins to the curb.

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Well, the easy one got taken right away, and then taken again. And again. But I do have a backup. That's the squirrel you find half eaten in your backyard, which you can only assume was the victim of some owl/hawk/very bold coyote, followed closely by the bird remains your innocent looking cat has dined on after eating the expensive cat food you ordered online. And then there's always that cute little mouse the author and I once tried to trap in the back room of our old house. If I remember correctly we screamed like six year olds at one point, probably terrifying the poor thing.

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In my defense, something touched my arm and I swore the mouse escaped so I momentarily lost control of my arms and legs.

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